Listen to a feeling
deepening practice to learn from (not fix) feelings
Any feeling—big or small, named or unnamed, new or frequent—is a friend asking to be heard.
We’ve been taught to identify, categorize, manage, and resolve our feelings. Sometimes this is helpful (e.g., hunger → eat, frantic → breathe). Too often, though, when we swiftly name and try to “do something about” a feeling, we prevent ourselves from listening and learning from its wisdom.
There are small ways we can invite more listening to our relationship with feelings:
Say hello. When you notice a feeling within your body, say hello. Or, maybe, welcome, I see you. Allow whatever happens.
Loosen your names. Whether you feel a small sensation or a big “emotion,” notice when you’re about to give it a name. Pause and let the feeling be without a label for a minute, maybe longer.
Do nothing. Notice when you want to “do” something (including “think”) with a feeling. Pause, even for a brief moment, and simply be with the feeling. Don’t try to fix or change or trace or understand.
Each practice opens space to listen and receive in relationship with feelings.
Over time, this will grow in trust and reciprocity.
Let it be slow. Let it be true. Let it be you.
*
Love, Melissa
Additional Resources:
Feelings as Material (essay)
It’s not a problem (essay)
The Science of How Our Minds and Our Bodies Converge in the Healing of Trauma by Maria Papova (with other resource links)
No Mud, No Lotus by Thich Nhat Hanh
Button Snail Hum is a pollination project of Noticing Matters.
Learn more and connect with me: melissaabutler.com | melissa@melissaabutler.com
